The division inside, the division to come, the endless fragmentation

Some days I don't know where to begin when I get up. This sunny Monday morning is one of them. I have to get into the work because people expect me to write things. There are so many tasks, and on this day I slept in until 7 a.m. and then lay in bed for a while not wanting to move. 

There's a sense that the pathway out of here will close if I don't at least begin to look for it. I feel I have to have it open for me to feel free enough to do the work I've been doing openly for years. I'm very concerned.

Something in me is tied up today. I'm not sure I'll get to it in a public document. 

Rouladen sandwich, February 12, 2025


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